


Ringing in my Ears

by Castia



Series: Purplephone [1]
Category: FNAF, Five Nights at Freddy's
Genre: Aubergine, Humor, M/M, Nerdy Scott, Past dead children, Purple Pervert, purplephone
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-17
Updated: 2017-08-17
Packaged: 2018-12-16 17:25:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 13,272
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11833509
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Castia/pseuds/Castia
Summary: What to say?Scott, the Phone Guy, had worked at Freddy Fazbear's Pizza for a long time now.Yet still, nobody's quite sure what kind of a person he is.Oh, sure. He's a hard-working, phone-headed, strict person...But hobbies? Nobody has a clue.What's he like away from work? A mystery.So when a certain Purple tinted man gains interest in the phone head, things get interesting.





	1. Who's a Nerd?

Vincent grinned. Watching Scott walk around the restaraunt. Sometimes glancing towards his bottom. He's not lacking in that department- He once tried flirting with the phone headed man, but that resulted in a slap. Then there was that other time he tried cornering the taller... But that was a bust too, since he held up a needle.

However, today will be different! He's going to follow Scott home! Vincent was going to find out what Scott does in his spare time. His hobbies, his fears- he just wanted to know something, for gods' sake!

As the Assistant Manager, Scott was trusted to lock up. Mike was taking the Night Shift today and it was about to start. Someone had to watch the animatronics after all. Vincent hid behind a bush. Waiting for Scott to walk home.

Which he did.

He walked the whole way home. Stopping only once for a few minutes to stare at a cat. When he tried to pet it, however... it bit him. Poor Scotty~

The purple man had to giggle.

Once Scott had gotten to a front door of a house... He just stopped. Standing infront of it for five... then ten minutes... What was he doing? Vincent stayed hidden by the fence. Then the phone headed man whipped his head around and hissed.

" Vincent, when are you going to leave me alone? " The grape stayed still... Was he really discovered or- " Stop talking to yourself like you're in a movie! Your narration is what gave you away, idiot! " ... The suspect is in possession of a mind of it's own. Scott phone-palmed as Vincent jumped up.

" I'm impressed, Scotty~! So! Whaddya hide from us? " Before the taller could answer, he continued. " I mean- Mike's the one friend who picks Rainbow Road in Mario Kart, Jeremy is the shy Anime Fan, Fritz is the guy who eats, I'm the creepy guy- From all those things, you can already tell what kind of people we are! But you? Phone Guy? Jeez. " Scott crossed his arms. Unamused.

" So you decided to follow me... " Vincent nodded. " To my house..." Nod. " ... And then you'd be locked out here in the dark, not being able to enter the house and not learning anything about me. Thus, making the entire trip meaningless. " ... Oh. Vincent hadn't thought of that. " You know what would have been smarter? Simply asking. "

...

Huh.

Why hadn't Vincent thought of that either?

" Alright, Ring Ring~! " He stepped forward until he was right infront of the taller male. A wide grin on his face as he tilted his head. " What are your hobbies? Love interests? " Scott sighed and crossed his arms. " Hey, I asked! "

" Yes. Yes you did. But, I never said that I'll answer. " Scott unlocked his door and stepped in. Attempting to make a swift notion and shut the door in Vincent's face. The purple male blinked. He caught a glimpse...

Did he...

See a red superhero suit?

* * *

Another day at work. It was Friday now and the boss had volunteered to take the shift today. The reason why? Nobody knows. But it was nice since Mike had asked if anyone had plans tonight. He wanted to go out and do things. Vincent presumed going to a bar or a place to dance.

Of course, Jeremy agreed to go. He had a major crush on Mike. Fritz had said no, saying he had to clean his house up a bit. He, himself had agreed since he had nothing better to do. Mike asked Scott, but the phone-headed man said he was busy tonight. He refused to elaborate any further.

What could he be busy with...? Vincent wondered. But, once work was over... The three decided to go home to change real quick. Mike said to just wear something casual... so it can't be a place to dance... Where were they going?

* * *

Vincent's question was soon answered when he found himself standing infront of a shop. A shop full of... nerd... stuff... Well, there were some cool things. Weapon replica's from fantasy games. He looked at Mike, raising a brow.

" What? I thought we could try some new things. C'mon. " He walked in. Jeremy followed shortly there after. What was so great about some kind of shop in the middle of a city? He walked in... It was rather large, actually. So many figurines, books and other things like dice. They found some fantasy board games on the second floor and some video games on the top floor. " Hm... There are a few board games I saw that could be fun... " He shrugged. Vincent rolled his eyes and walked around a bit. Getting bored... Then he saw something catch his eye for a split second.

A red phone? Was that Scott? Nah... It couldn't be... could it? It was only for a split second.

There was a downstairs too, that they hadn't noticed. Mike and Jeremy walked over to him. Looking down... Huh. Some people seemed to be down there, chatting. Why not check it out? The three walked down together. Looking around. There were some tables where people painted figurines and another table where two people sat. A little... map? Some papers and pencil with them.

What was this called again? Dens and Drakes?

Vincent looked around. No sign of Scott... He was imagining things. Maybe he needs to take a break from the phone-head if he's already imagining him. The guy at the table with the tabletop game called out.

" Vincent, c'mon! Hurry up! " They... didn't look at him. And he definitely didn't know these two dorks. Jeremy looked at him with a brow raised, which he shrugged off. Then someone passed the three without noticing them. A specific tall male with a phone for a head and a sweater that had a Deadpool logo on it passed them.

" I got it, I got it. " He walked over to them and placed a thick book on the table. " Who's DMing this time? I already did it last week. " ... Did... Scott answer to Vincent's name? And why? Why did they even call him 'Vincent'? " Oliver? Mojacha? Still don't get why you two decided to play so suddenely. It was so sudden, it took forever to find the ol' character sheet. " He shook his head, chuckling.

The three stared wordlessly before Mike spoke up loudly.

" SCOTT, OH MY GOD. " Scott yelped, turning around and looking at the three. There was silence for a good while before Mike laughed. " Hahah! I didn't know you were into these nerd stuff! " The phone headed man seemed to be at a loss for words. Vincent walked over to the seat he presumed was Scott's. Looking over a paper that read ' **CHARACTER SHEET** '.

Yup.

The name of his level six Rogue was 'Vincent'. Honestly, he felt flattered. He turned to Scott with the biggest shit-eating grin he could muster. He got a- hidden by phone- glare.

" Well~! Interesting name choice for your character~ " He purred as he walked closer to Scott who pushed him away. Actually using Mike as a shield.

" I made that character before I met you, ya purple pervert. " He sounded strict again... When just a while ago, he sounded rather cheerful. He turned to the two people at the table. " I'm gonna skip our game today... As you can see, three stuff came up. " He quickly went up the stairs before anyone could argue with him. " See ya. "

He left the shop before anyone could say a thing. Jeremy stared a bit before stuttering apologies... As much as he liked Mike, he still wanted everyone to feel better. So, he decided to sprint off quickly and catch up to Scott.

Mike and Vincent stared at eachother for a moment before following both their colleagues out of the shop. Scott was walking away from all three. When he noticed Jeremy running after him, he held a hand on the top of his phone head. Now beginning to sprint.

The purple man was impressed. Scott was quite a fast runner as when they caught up to Jeremy, he had collapsed. No longer having the energy to go on. Why did he even run anyways? They work at the same place. So it's not like he can completely avoid any of the three...

But hey! Some good still came out of the night!

Vincent learned something new about Scott.


	2. Can you hear my Call?

The purple tinted man had returned to work and began following Scott around, as usual. But instead of flirting with him like he usually would, he was asking questions. Honestly, it was embarassing to Scott that his three co-workers walked in on him. What were they even doing there?! And it's even worse that Vincent saw his character's name... It's just a name for god's sake!

But no! The overgrown Aubergine, as his sister called him, was now asking questions and had the cheekiest grin on his face. Asking how long he's had this hobby, how often he preforms this hobby, if he could join in on the goddamn hobby!

Mike and Jeremy hadn't hounded him with questions. Which he was thankful for. Vincent though... UGH! He was supposed to be the normal one! The one who's smart, who's strict, who's-

" And that sweater! That was adorable~! " He groaned as he turned around to stuff a pizza into Vincent's mouth. He let out muffled sounds as Scott dragged him to a secluded part of the restaraunt. " Mhf~? "

" Listen here, you purple waste of space. I like Marvel, I like video games, I like fantasy things... SO WHAT. It's my choice and my life! Who cares?? I'm a human too! " The purple tinted man stared, tilting his head. " And I made my rogue a long time ago! He wasn't made after you! "

" And what was his full name? " Scott was silent for a good while. Judging by the wide grin still plastered on the other's face... Vincent knew what the name was. He mumbled the whole name. " What was that? Didn't hear ya, Scotty~ "

" Vincent Bishop! " He nodded. " P-Pure coincidence! You can't just presume stuff! Leave me alone! I have to take care of a new employee and I don't need you there to pester me! " Scott had stormed off, growling as he made his way to the prize corner. The purple male decided to hang back and watch. Ah, Scott looked so cute when he was mad. Then again, that was the state he was in, most of the time. He glanced towards the new employee. He was a bit taller than Scott, who was the tallest out of all of them. He overheard them speak. " Alright, so what's your name-? " The man did not answer. Just staring at Scott. " ... Uh- "

" Pretty Boy! It's been so long! " Scott visually froze up at the nickname whilst being pulled into a hug. " I was wonderin' where I remember that phone head from! You haven't changed! Except your height. " ... Something about this guy, made Vincent cringe. He didn't like him. " Remember me?? " Scott stared at him, trying to take a step back.

" ... Jonathan. "

" Bingo! " The taller of the two winked. Vincent looked at Scott to see if he was blushing. Showing any body positions that could give him away. But he looked rather... Fearful than nervous. " So, how have you been, dude? I would have thought you grew out of the stupid phone. "

" Jonathan, this is serious buisness. It's about your job, after all. And as the Assistant Manager, I decide if you get the job or not when the boss isn't here. Which, he isn't. " Formal as always, Scott straightened up. " Let me show you around. " They walked towards the Pirate Cover. The phone-headed man pointed towards the animatronic. " This is Foxy the pirate. One of the favorites of kids. However, I would ask that you refrain from yiffing it. I had to fire the last guy for that. " Vincent chuckled. Yeah. Good times. Jonathan tapped his chin a bit before smirking.

" Can I yiff you~? " He winked. Scott stared, unimpressed as he phone-palmed. Holding out his fingers to count.

" Don't yiff the bear, chicken, bunny, fox and ESPECIALLY not the phone. " He shrugged. T'was worth a shot. They continued. Something about this guy rubbed Vincent the wrong way. He was supposed to be the one flirting with Scott! How rude to just try and replace him. He watched the phone lead Jonathan around until they got back to the Prize Corner. " And that should be it. Now, you'll need to sign the contract. "

Now Vincent knew Jonathan was a real idiot. He didn't even bother to read the fine-print as he gave his signature. Scott placed it away and nodded. Shaking his hand... But Jonathan didn't pull away. Instead, just pulling him close.

" Whuh-?? " Scott stared at the taller with wide eyes under his phone head. Vincent couldn't hear what Jonathan whispered to his poor victim... But whatever he said seemed to make Scott pale. " ... R-Right... Anyways... I-I'll go back to work... " The phone-headed male quickly sprinted off into the break room. The purple tinted man was confused... Not even he could do that... He got up to follow his favorite Assistant Manager, tilting his head curiously.

* * *

 

" Scotty, it's okay. Caaaaalm down. " Vincent froze. Who was that? He peeked inside the room silently. Seeing Scott in a call using the phone head. Whoever was on the other end of the line, was someone he trusted... His mom? No, she sounded younger... A lady around Scott's age... Perhaps his girlfriend? The toast lover's chest ached at the thought... But why would he care! He just likes making the Phone Guy's life harder! That's... that's it... He decided to listen in longer.

" L-Luna, he's there again- he- "

" I know. I know. " Luna was the name...? Huh... Vincent will remember that name. " But stay calm, alright? Don't break down again... " Again? Break down _again??_ Oh, if Vincent found out who made Scott break down then he'll-

...

No, wait! He doesn't care! He... No.

No, he does care.

He loves Scott.

But Scott doesn't love him.

" Wh-What if he tries to do it again-?? Oh god- Luna, I-I can't t-take it if it h-happens again-!! " Scott was stuttering more than Jeremy, which was both irritating and adorable to Vincent. Hah.

Nerd.

" It won't! Trust me. Alright? Do you trust me...? " Scott was silent before letting out a sound of confirmation. " Good. I'll visit ya next week, alright? I love ya. "

" I love you too... " Vincent froze... He said it so sweetly... He meant it. Scott had a girlfriend. His heart ached as he crossed his arms. It doesn't matter! He's a killer! Scott wouldn't have liked that anyway! He should be happy for the phone head...

But he wasn't.

Then he saw Jeremy and Mike come by. He decided to throw Scott a bone and talked loud enough so the Phone Guy could hear.

" Hey! Mikey! Jeremy! "

" Don't call me Mikey. " Vincent could hear soft mumbling from the room. It seemed Scott got the message. When Mike and Jeremy got into the room, Scott was sitting at the table. Sipping some coffee... As if he hadn't been talking to his girlfriend all panicked. Honestly, it was worrying... He could hide his pain and suffering so well.  _Too_ well. " Hey, Scott! Wanted to ask ya something. Well- Jeremy did. " He gave the shy boy a gentle nudge.

" Y-Yeah... u-uhm... So... D-Do you w-want to p-play with u-us? W-We just g-got a new g-game... Wanted to k-know if you w-wanted to play with u-us... " Scott rose a brow. As if asking Jeremy to explain further. " I-It's... uhm... Called W-World of W-Warcraft... And- " In a matter of seconds Scott was up infront of Jeremy. His eyes sparkling under the phone head.

" World of Warcraft?? Oh! What faction? Race, class?? You gotta go Alliance, I could power boost you two real quick! Get yourselves some heirlooms too, then when you're a hundred we'll try and get your Artifact Level as high as possible! Oh- but you need the right spec too. Tanks and healers are always useful- " He blinked when he noticed Jeremy's confused face and Mike's big grin. The poor punny guard was trying not to laugh. " ... I mean... " He cleared his voice, sipping more coffee. " I could try... Here, I'll give you the server names. " He pulled a marker out of his pocket and wrote it down on both's hands.

Vincent got on his tip-toes to try and catch a glimpse of what was written...

'Argent Dawn'

Huh...

What a nerd.

The three talked a bit more before Jeremy and Mike had gone back to do gods knows what. Meanwhile, Vincent quickly wrote the name of the server on his hand.

No way was he gonna miss this...

He's gonna get Jeremy to invite him to this party too!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Never play an MMORPG game like WoW, with Scott...


	3. Play Games, not Rage.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Scott no-

Jeremy and Mike thought this could be fun. Just some gaming. But... boy. Were they wrong. Vincent was enjoying himself, watching as Scott yelled about the fifth party-member in the group over the voice-chat. Even though that fifth player wasn't in the voice-chat they made and couldn't hear a thing. At this point, he was cursing more than Mike.

" OH, YOU MOTHERFUCKING IDIOT!! USE A MOUSE TO TURN, YOU SHITHEAD KEYBOARD TURNER, I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD I'LL KICK YOU, YOU LITTLE FUCKING NOOB- ARGH!! " Vincent was holding in all his laughed as Jeremy just looked shocked. Mike blinked a couple of times.

" Holy fuck, Scott. It's just a game. "

" A GAME THAT SOME PEOPLE ARE APPARENTLY TOO STUPID TO PLAY! IT'S ALREADY DUMBED DOWN, DO THEY NEED A FUCKING HAND HOLDING THEM IN ORDER TO ENTER A FUCKING INSTANCE?! WAILING CAVERNS ISN'T AS BIG AND CONFUSING AS BEFORE, DUMBASS!! SHOULD HAVE FUCKIN' SEEN IT IN VANILLA! " Jeremy was goddamn terrified of Scott and how he was yelling. Despite playing a Night Elf druid who's supposed to be nice and peaceful- Scott was anything BUT peaceful right now.

" Uhhhh- S-Scott... maybe we should take a break a-and- " Jeremy was interrupted as Scott growled. By now, the fifth party member left since Scott stopped healing him. But the phone head was definitely still angry.

Hm...

Maybe he needs to let his rage out...

" Oh, Scotty~ " Vincent called with a smirk on his face. " Wanna have a dual? I wanna see if I can beat you~ " Well, he isn't lying. The purple killer was sure he got the hang of the game and could beat anyone. So when Scott giggled, it irritated him slightly.

" A dual? Seriously? " He cleared his voice. Okay, apparently they weren't going to finish the dungeon? " I could do it with my healing spec. And that's saying something. " Ohoho, Scott's real cocky... Alright. Vincent challenged Scott to a dual. " If I win, you're gonna stop tainting the kitchen's toaster. Capiché? "

" But what if I win~? "

3...

2...

" You can't. "

1...

* * *

 

 

 

 

 

...

 

 

 

 

 

Five fights.

Five duals, yesterday.

 

 

 

 

 

...

 

 

 

 

 

Vincent stared at the toaster in the kitchen which he couldn't touch... Or could make toast from for a month.

 

 

 

 

 

He lost.

This sucks.

Scott walked over to the toaster and made some toast. Eating it through the logic defying phone. Vincent couldn't see it, but he knew it was there. Under the phone. He smirked.

" What's wrong, Vincent~? Something bothering you? " He kept eating the toast. The phone head was all too cocky. Speaking with a sing-song voice. The taller male stepped nearer, eating the toast slowly. It's really rare... but... at this very moment.

Vincent was pissed at the Phone Guy.

" Yo, slut! Suck mah dick! Hahah! If you're so pissed, maybe you should think before you challenge the best gamer in town to a dual! "

... Oh.

_Ohhhhhh, maybe this'll be fun~_

" Suck your dick, Scott? Well. I wouldn't mind~ "

" ... Fucking what- "

" Oh, you know. I would push you onto the couch... Slowly...~ " He grabbed the phone head and pushed him against the wall of the break room. The tall male let out a yelp- " Play with that nice dial of yours, tug on that long cord- " The purple tinted male turned the dial for a moment.

At that moment, Scott quickly headbutted the poor male whilst squeaking.

" YOU FUCKING-!! " Vincent grabbed Scott as he was about to fall, pulling the taller down with him so he was on top of the purple killer. " UAH- PERVERT!! " at that moment, the door slammed open. Mike stood there.

Staring.

All three stared at eachother.

" ... Ooookay, I'll leave you two lovebirds to it- "

" WE AREN'T DOING ANYTHING, SCHMIDT!! " Scott screeched out, getting up quickly. His cheeks were definitely a bright red under the phone. He was sure of it. 

" Yet~ " Next thing Vincent knew-

Scott threw a toaster at his face. A loud smash was heard.

" ... " All three stared at the broken toaster. Vincent looked at the purple head.

" I hope you can run as good as you moan, Scotty. Because we are going shopping for another toaster or I'll be fucking a phone tonight, I swear. " ...

Something about the tone of his voice.

Told Scott.

He wasn't bluffing.

" ... Fine. " He mumbled with a sigh. Mike couldn't help but smile and quickly slip in a joke. He liked being a professional asshole.

" It's a date- " ... Mike knew that if looks could kill... He'd have died ten times over to Scott. Heck, he's probably thinking about all the ways he could murder Mike or drive the man into suicide by leaving his recordings on loop.

" A date~ " Vincent winked with a grin.


	4. It's a 'date'!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Any sentence underlined in this chapter means there are two people speaking at the same time!
> 
> Just saying here. Now, on to the chapter!

" I already hate our date. " Scott mumbled as he followed Vincent along the aisles. So many toasters. The purple male was looking through them all. He sent the phone head a grin, signalling he heard what the taller had said. " The thing I hate most? You. Of all the things that are happening in this 'date'. Your obnoxious purple and shit-eating grin. "

" Sooooo, you admit this to being our date? "

" I admit nothing! But for all I know, you'll kill me and stuff me into a suit! " Vincent's smile had faltered for only a split second before it was back. He really could give the Grinch a run for his money.

" Oh, Scotty~ I wouldn't do that! You're way too important to me~! " A scoff came from under the phone as he crossed his arms. Vincent went through the different toasters, finally pulling out a shiny red one. " This. This is perfect. "

" Mhmm. " A content hum came from Scott. " The color red is indeed a wonderful thing. Can symbolize aggressiveness or hot passion. " White eyes blinked and stared at the phone head. What... was that whole thing just about? " Hot passion for me~? " He did not seem amused. " Just kidding...~! But where did all that come from? Didn't know you knew about those kind of stuff. What about purple? Whaddya have to say about purple? "

" Eggplant. Grape. Aubergine- " Vincent squinted as Scott let out a chuckle. " Just kidding. Heh. Alright, purple. Associated with royalty. It symbolizes power, nobility, luxury, and ambition. Conveys wealth and extravagance. Associated with wisdom, dignity, independence, creativity, mystery, and magic. None of those things, I'd ever associate with you. "

" Don't think I'm mysterious~? " He asked. While this would normally be a question Scott takes seriously- It's hard to take a guy who is cradling a toaster in his arms  _seriously._  

" You do have a slight mystery to you, Bishop. But, I normally see you as the guy who taints toasters. "

" It was only on lonely nights! " The purple man argued. Scott only let out a chuckle and rolled his eyes under the mask. But to Vincent, it was rare that he could ever bring the phone to laugh. Heck, they've never actually gone out to talk like this. Scott didn't even start insulting him! If you don't count the start of this, that is. " Maybe I'm maaaagical and own a Unicorn you don't know about! "

" Pfft- I'll believe it when I see it. " He smirked at Vincent who snickered to himself.

" You can see my horn anyday, Scott~ "

" Ew. " They went to the register to pay for the toaster. Vincent never let go of it. Holding on like it were his child. Or his love. Either way- his relationship with toasters was truely, an unnatural thing. " You know. If you and toasters are a thing... and you make toast. Does that mean you're eating your children? "

" ... " Vincent bursted out in laughter. " Scott, I'm not  _that_ insane! "

" Insane enough. Could have fooled me. " They walked out the shop. " Hm... It's almost Halloween. " Ah, yes. October. Vincent loved that holiday. And excuse not to clean the blood up- I meeeeean. Get candy.

" Do you like Halloween, Scott? " His reply was a nod.

" Love it. I get to dress up in costumes. Act like somebody else. Someone not me! It's fantastic. " A rare frown came across the purple male's face. Before it turned into a smirk. " What are you smirking about, Eggplant man? "

" I bet you cosplay. " The phone rolled his eyes. " Just imagine you dress up like someone while wearing a phone! Hah! That'd be hilarious! "

" For your info, when I cosplay... I don't wear a phone. That would be ridiculous. " Oh? This perked up the purple man's interest. " I just wear a ton of make-up to mask my sleep deprived eyes. I look fabulous. " He jokingly posed. This...

This was a whole new side of Scott that Vincent didn't even know existed. He wasn't a buzzkill but actually rather witty. Or atleast tries to be. As they continued walking, he could have sworn he heard Scott hum a tune.

This is Halloween, huh? He smirked and waited before starting to sing the lyrics. 

" Boys and girls of every age  
Wouldn't you like to see something strange?Come with us and you will see! This, our town of Halloween~ " Scott blinked in surprise before actually smiling. Soon, he sang along too. A high voice coming from him, but it stayed completely in tune.

" This is Halloween, this is Halloween! Pumpkins scream in the dead of night! This is Halloween, everybody make a scene! Trick or treat till the neighbors gonna die of fright~ "

" It's our town, everybody scream!  
In this town of Halloween " Vincent broke into dance to the music they sang. Ignoring any stares they were getting. " C'mon, babe! Keep singing along! " Scott facepalmed before continuing.

" I am the one hiding under your bed  
Teeth ground sharp and eyes glowing red~! " Vincent held the toaster with one hand, then tugged Scott closer with the other.

" I am the one hiding under your stairs,  
Fingers like snakes and spiders in my hair...~ "

" This is Halloween, this is Halloween! Halloween! Halloween! Halloween! Halloween! In this town we call home, everyone hail to the pumpkin song~! " They both laughed together, now spinning a bit. 'Dancing'. 

Then Vincent pulled the phone head into a dip. At this moment, Scott realised how near they were right now. His breath hitched and as they stared at eachother for a long moment. Now in complete silence. Why did the grape have to stare? His lips pursed as he leaned nearer. Scott's heart was thumping in his chest. It was getting faster- he felt like it was going to burst-

But then fear sparked through in his brain and he gently pushed the purple tinted male away. Vincent blinked before pulling him up onto his feet. Mockingly pouting. Or atleast- Scott presumed he was doing this to mock the phone head. But honestly, it surprised him how cooperative the Aubergine was. Almost... caring.

" Sorry. " He mumbled. They continued walking. Once they got to the restaraunt, they wandered to the kitchen and Vincent placed the shiny red toaster onto the counter. " Ah, this looks wonderful! " Scott shrugged with a smirk. Vincent turned the phone head and winked, showing a thumbs up. " See? Hanging out with me wasn't so bad, eh~? " The phone stared at him before shaking his head.

" As weird as it sounds to me to say this... But. You're right. It wasn't so bad. It was actually lots of fun. " He smiled under the phone. " But don't think that means we're buddy-buddy. I still hate you with a passion. " It was sudden- but Scott was pulled into a hug as that shit eating grin was back.

" I love ya too, Scotty. Ah, just a shame you're taken. " ... Wait what. Before the phone head could question Vincent, the insane grape already pulled away. Heading out of the kitchen. Leaving a confused Scott alone in the room.

" ... Whaaaaaaaaaat? "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eyyyy-  
> Scotty's got the slightest of all slight crushes that ever existed in the history of slight crushes!
> 
> So cute. Hope ya enjoyed this chapter!


	5. HELLO, 911, I THINK I'M GAY?!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm dead. That chapter name-  
> Credits to my Senpai-Chan, @ImTheMun!  
> For her legit Chapter naming skills!!
> 
> I can't name stuff worth shit-
> 
> There are the logical thoughts and the sinner thoughts.  
> Which one does Scott listen to?

Now. Scott has heard a lot of weird things in his life. A purple weirdo fucking toasters. A fatass accidentaly eating a toast that had the purple weirdo's 'jelly' on it. An animatronic biting someone's lower lobe off. A shy guy who likes lemons- if it's just the sour lemons, Scott wasn't sure. But never.

Never ever.

Has he heard of himself being taken??

It's absurd. Weird. I mean- does Vincent mean his mobile phone? He does have a close relationship to it, ever since he got Mystic Messenger. 707 and Yoosung are bae- but just because his character is taken by either of those two, doesn't mean _he_  is! Right?

Or is that a thing now?

Fuck. He didn't know. He needed advice and there was no way in hell that he was going to ask any of his colleagues. So, he called his good friend. Sinner- nah, Mojacha.

He held his cellphone near his phone head where his ear would be. Listening to the ringing before his fellow nerd answered.

" Hey, what's the word- humming bird? " He rolled his eyes at the rhymes. " No, seriously. What's up, buttercup? " Does Scott regret calling her up? Yes. Does he regret not inching to the bleach? You bet your ass he does. The bleach sounds like a wonderful drink right now. " Okay, okay. I've run outta rhymes. These are simply hard times. " He's inching towards a gun. " Just talk, will ya? "

" Mojacha, if I were to be playing a dating game like Mystic Messenger. Does it count as being taken if I went on a date with one of the characters? Fictional characters, I mean? " Scott could hear a chuckle on the other line.

" Dude, if that were the case... I'd be married like- seven times over this month alone! Nah, those aren't real. " Of course they weren't. He wasn't lucky enough for that. " Why are you askin'?"

" I dunno- Vincent said that it's a shame that I'm taken. "

"  _YOU??_ With  _that_ purple hottie? He said it's a shame- Oh my god. He totally likes you- " She could hear a groan. " Buuuuuut you don't like him? I could try and have 'im if you aren't interested. I like weird. "

" No, you're just kinky. I won't answer anything related like... dating him. In any way. But I can't imagine who else he could have been talking about. " He tapped his phone chin. " Hommet Shaw, maybe? Nah, he hasn't seen me game and swoon over that guy yet. "

" Scott. Dude. Bruh. Amigo. " The phone operator blinked and rose a brow. Now silent as he listened to what his friend had to say. " We both know the Grape has a  _massive_ crush on you. Why not give him a chance? " He sputtered at that... that mere idea! Him and Vincent??

No.

Nu uh.

He's insane. He's crazy. Perverted, weird, freakin' purple, hot, muscular, idiotic, unreliable and-

Wait.

Two of those things are not like the others.

...

Bah! Who cares?

Scott'll admit. He has the looks. Like- hot damn. How is he still single? There are enough people who wouldn't care about his personality as long as he had those looks. 

BUT.

The Phone Guy isn't one of those people.

Is he? Ah, as long as he doesn't think of the silky hair, flirty smirk, well built body or raspy and seductive voice... he'll be fine.

...

_Okay, what the fuck Scott? You aren't gay and even if you were- YOU ARE NOT GAY FOR VINCENT OF ALL PEOPLE. Have some dignity, damn it!_

_Not like Vincent would mind~? Like Mojacha said- give it a shot! Maybe get to know him... Have a romantic dinner- he may be a pervert but boy, he can be so romantic when he wants to be! Rawr~_

_Okay. Let's count again. Just so we're all clear. Vincent is unstable. Unreliable. Perverted. Crazy. Unpredictable-_

_Hot, sweet, unique, definitely likes us, great voice, great body, perfect man-_

_WE ARE NOT GOING GAY FOR THAT ASS, YOU HEAR ME?!_

" Scott? " The phone head snapped out of his thoughts when he heard his friend's voice. " Earth to Phone? You hear me, dude? "

" I'm here. Hey, I think I'll end the call. Work and all. Y'know. " Scott heard her let out a grunt of confirmation. Or laziness. Either was possible.

" You gonna raid with us tonight? "

" You bet. Bye, Mojacha. "

" Bye, Gay Phone. " Scott choked when she ended the call with that nickname. Shaking his head. The tall man was sure his blush could be seen through the phone. Ignoring the feeling, he decided to get right back to work.

_We are not gay for that Grape._

_Not yet~_

* * *

Days had past rather quickly. Nothing too noticeable. Sometimes Vincent would flirt, but nothing too obnoxious. The purple male sighed as he watched the phone headed man work. Talking to employee's. Avoiding the one called Jonathan... He still doesn't like him. At all. Uh uh. Nope.

That's when someone tapped his shoulder.

" Excuse me, Eggplant-Man~! " ... Eye twitch- Grape. He gets. Toaster Fucker. He can live with. BUT HE WILL NOT BE AN EGGPLANT!! Vincent growled and turned around to the person who tapped his shoulder.

It was a young looking lady. Taller than him and about matches Scott's height. Damn, she's tall- She had piercing green eyes, a wide smile, fiery red hair and creamy skin. She was also very... well endowed. In the chest area. Honestly, she was rather attractive in Vincent's opinion.

And her voice was rather... familiar...

" Hey. Lover boy. " The lady's voice interrupted his thoughts. Causing him to raise a brow. " You've been oogling the phone head for a while now. Specifically, his ass. " ... Whaaaaat? Sometimes the purple murderer's mind would wander~ " Do you like him~? " He huffed and rolled his eyes.

" None of your buisness, kid. "

" Kid? I'm 26, bud. " Wait- really? She looked younger. More like a teenager. Or maybe that was because of the way she dressed. Different colored socks, bottomless and shoulderless shirt, bracelets, jewelry, ponytail to the side and a collar with a moon. She definitely looks like a teenage rebel. " But dude. Seriously. That guy is sweet. Trust me. "

" You don't know shit. "

" I think I know him a lot better than you do, Grape-Man. " He huffed and glared before a big grin spread across his face. " What? Trying to be scary? Puh-Lease. I love watching horror movies. " Oh, how tempted he was to drive a knife through her chest and gut her like-

" LUNA! " Vincent blinked and turned to look at Scott who tackle hugged the lady- wait...

 _She's_ Luna?? Scott's girlfriend? His significant other?? The girl who has literally found out that Vincent likes her boyfriend?!?! Ohhhhhh dear god- not. Good. Repeat! Not. Good.

The phone headed male turned to glare at Vincent. Oh, no no no no. Not good. Please don't think he flirted with his girlfriend-

" Did this Grape try to flirt with you, sis?? " ... Sis?

" Nah, this guy? He's hot, bro. But not my type. " ... Bro?? Vincent looked between the two. They both looked at him and Luna grinned. The purple male was sure that Scott was grinning too. They now spoke in unison.

" Hello, hello! Our names are Luna and Scott Cawthon. We're twins. Well met! " ... twins. Siblings.

Not.

Lovers.

Vincent stared before bursting out in laughter at his own stupidity. Hah, why did he even presume stuff?? Ah, how hilarious!

Scott's single and ready to mingle.

" So! I'm an eggplant now, am I? " Scott shrugged and pointed at his sibling. Huh... if they're twins, maybe Vincent can get a bit of an idea as to how the phone head looked like...

" It was her idea. "

" Well, Scotty...~ wanna touch my  _mini_ eggplant~? " He was met with silence. But Luna seemed all too amused, slapping a hand over her mouth to keep herself from laughing too loud.

" ... Mini is the right word. Let me go get my magnifying glass. "

...

Ouch.

That hurt.

So bad.


	6. Double Calls

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prepare for trouble-  
> Make it double!

" So. Luna, was the name? Twin sister? Oh, boy...~ Really gets my mind tickling, wondering how Scotty looks~" the purple man purred, glancing towards his favorite phone head who rolled his eyes under the mask and crossed his arms.

" Trash. " He huffed as an answer. " I don't sleep much, don't eat much, don't go out much- seriously. I'm really frail. The only thing good about me is my height. Tall as all hell. " His sister blinked before quickly adding-

" And the floofy hair! Don't forget the floofy hair! " Scott snapped his fingers, nodding.

" Yes! " ... For some reason, Vincent felt like he should know that reference from somewhere. " Anyways- "

" Oooooh, who's that cute lookin' hunk~? " the phone blinked and looked to whatever- or rather. Whoever his sister was talking about.

...

Mike??

" ... Okay, no. Nonononono, hell no. You are not dating that pun telling ASSHOLE. You hear me? I'd rather fuck Vincent than let you get together with Mike! " The girl laughed at her brother's reaction.

" So that's what his name is? I'll just walk over then and- " Scott had to think fast. And Vincent was too distracted by his statement to be of any help. So- using the knowledge he had of Mike... he ran over to the pun telling asshole.

Singing a song he knows that Mike hates.

" RING DINGA DING, DINGA DINGA DING DING! IT'S ALL ABOUT THAT RINGTONE THAT I SING! " The male who was missing a frontal lobe stared at the phone head.

Glaring.

" Scott. You are terrible. "

" Karma for the puns, asshole! " He smirked under the phone. People were staring, but Scott didn't mind. This was for his sister. He could sit in the corner of embarrassment and depression later!

But...

Luna walked past both.

She spoke to the male who was currently clearing the break-room fridge out.

Fritz Smith.

Scott's jaw dropped under the phone. She wasn't talking about Mike. But freakin' Fritz.

Okay.  _Now_ he can wallow and cry in the corner of embarrassment and depression. The tall male walked over there and sat down. Soon, a grape approached him with the widest grin on his face EVER.

" So... Fucking me is still a possibility, Mr. Ring Ring~? "

...

Regrets have been made.

* * *

T'was a Halloween night and Vincent got to the restaraunt. They had decorated the place pretty well with spider webs and pumpkins. It looked cool. Apparently, everyone was in costume but him. He walked around.

Halloween is his favorite holiday. 

An excuse to not cleaning up the blood and such.

It was great! Sneaking razor blades into candy... He looked around. Mike was dressed as a werewolf. Fritz was a dashing vampire, surprisingly. Jeremy was a mummy... Hm. Where's Scott-

Suddenely a knife was held to his throat. Red and fake. He rose a brow as he saw Luna walk over- In a blue sweater with pink stripes. She carried a stick around and had a bandage on her left cheek. A collar with a red heart hanging from it.

Huh. Frisk. He got that reference.

" Chara! No! Bad! No killing! " She huffed. Her eyes shut. Vincent was pushed away harshly and he turned around to see the usual phone head. Pink cheeks colored onto his phone. He had a green sweater on with one yellow stripe. The red knife in his hand as he had a heart necklace. Chara. So these two were dressed up like from Undertale.

" Oh, but where's the fun in that~? " He giggled, playing with the very tip of the knife. At first glance, the blade looked sharp and real. So honestly- with the way Scott spoke and played with the knife...

Made Vincent wish he'd play with his purple knife.

Scott squinted under the phone. Oh no. Oh god no. Vincent is thinking something perverted again. He can tell by the pink cheeks and how the insane grape was drooling. Ugh. The phone head rolled his eyes as he took his sister's hand.

" C'mon. Let's go to the comic book store or something. " The toaster lover was snapped out of his thoughts as he watched Scott lead his confused twin out. Ah. He can't let them leave so early, now can he?

He followed them out.

* * *

Following the twins had lead Vincent to the comic book store. And boy- he thought the Pizzeria looked great... This takes it to a whole different level. Nerds really take these holidays seriously. There were different things from different scary games hanging around. Slender Man, Bendy and the Ink Machine, etc. He rose a brow as he saw two of Scott's friends he remembered played with him some kinda table-top game when he, Jeremy and Mike were last in this store. Speaking with Scott's sister.

The Phone Guy himself was nowhere in sight. 

The purple male rose a brow as he stepped past crowds. Winking at one lady- she fell over. Heh. Still got it!~

He found the phone head drinking some... wine? Punch? Juice? He wasn't sure. He 'bumped' into the other and chuckled softly.

" Oops~ " Scott squinted. " Sorry for bumping into you! How clumsy of me! Anyways. " Vincent almost wrapped an arm around Scott. Almost. But he decided not to. Instead placing a hand on his own hip. " You seem to enjoy Halloween! "

" Heh... Yeah. I get to have free candy, dress up... " Ah, so rather childish things. " Be someone else for a day, y'know? Someone who isn't me. It's cool! " Vincent felt like he wanted to gag. Like talking to a kid- geez. So cheesy.

" Ah, well. I guess if you say so... But you realise you'd look better with no phone on, right? " Scott rolled his eyes.

" Hah, I'm not nearly drunk enough to take it off. Especially not with you around. " ... So... Now Vincent had a goal for tonight. Get Scott drunk, then see his face!

" Alright... Then let's play a game! We both drink so much- and see who holds their liqour better! " The phone stared at him blankly. Eh, was worth a shot. But even Vincent knew that Scott would never even-

" Sure. "

" Really?! " Okay, his white eyes widened. Staring at Scott and trying to keep his jaw from dropping.

" Why not? It's like gaming. I'll kick your ass. " ... He seems cocky about his drinking skills.

...

Fuck, what did Vincent get himself into? He's gonna get alcohol poisoning or something.

* * *

Lots of shots later and Vincent was regretting his decision deeply. Scott was hiccuping and swaying like crazy- obviously drunk but apparently still not 'drunk enough' to take off the damn phone. Everything was so blurry and the purple male slurred everytime he spoke. Letting incoherent sounds out. He took another sip of his drink-

And fell over.

"Ghhhhhhh.......~ hic! " He squinted. The light from the ceiling blinded slightly. The grape heard a clicking sound before someone walked over. " Luhhhhhhhnaaaaa? " He waved a hand around. Ugh- he couldn't see very well and was pretty sure when he's gonna wake up, it was gonna be as if someone dropped an ice cream truck over his head.

Ten times over.

" Happy Halloween, ya big Grape. " He felt a gentle kiss on his forehead. Soft lips. Wait- that wasn't even a female voice-! Wasn't that...?

The thought never ended since Vincent fell unconcious.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Halloween!


	7. Breaking Bad

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No drugs tho-

Days had past since halloween. Weeks, even and Luna had already gone back to her own home. Scott huffed and once in a while, tapped his own lips. He was... really drunk that day. But, then again. So was Vincent. He probably doesn't even remember a thing, so. No worries! Right? Ugh... No, this... insane grape can't ever know. He refuses to tell that grinning Aubergine jack shit! No! Never!

He shook his head.

_Just get dressed, Scott. It's late, you already called Mike up. You can rest now._

As the male worked on getting his pajamas on, he heard a loud crash coming from his kitchen. Oh god... had someone broken in...?? He grabbed his phone head from the table beside his bed, slipping it on. Grabbing a replica of his Captain America shield and a replica of Thor's hammer... he approached his kitchen.

It was dark...

So he switched on the light. And what he saw...

What. He. Saw.

Made him want to barf.

However, all the neighbours heard was the phone head yelling.

" VINCENT, I SWEAR TO GOD!! UNHAND MY TOASTER AND PUT YOUR DICK BACK WHERE IT BELONGS BEFORE I MAKE YOU FEEL A NORSE GOD'S WRATH!! " The baby on the top floor cried.

* * *

Vincent rubbed his head with an ice pack, groaning as Scott tapped his foot. The weapons were placed to the side after the purple male had left the phone's toaster alone.

" Ow... Scott, goddamn it. You didn't need to go that far... "

"  _I_ went too far?! You were fucking my toaster! " The taller glared, crossing his arms as the grape shrugged. " Oh my god. You are absolutely disgusting! Revolting! "

" Whatever. " The Eggplant mumbled. Scott may have killed a lotta braincells with that stupid nerd hammer- ... Wait. " So... " Vincent glanced around the room. Now fully aware how much... nerd stuff were here. Lots of things from Marvel. Gaming things from Blizzard and DnD. Heck, the toaster had a Deadpool logo on it! " You're a nerd. "

He got up. Looking around. Ignoring Scott's protests, he walked around the house. Different kinds of stands with costumes. Some unfinished... Figurines everywhere. Posters. All that's missing is some anime and DC-

Oh wait. Nope. Scratch the anime thing, he's got that in his room. Some body pillows too.

" GET OUT OF MY ROOM OR I FUCKING SWEAR- " The phone head seethed. " How did you even find my address?? Oh. Wait. No. Dumb question. You're a stalker. " Vincent nodded. " Can you please leave before I call the cops?? "

" No can do! "

" Why not?! " Vincent grabbed Scott's hand. Pulling him close. The nerd's cheeks glowed a bright red under the phone. The purple male's white eyes staring deep into the other's... dial. Well, eyes too. But the grape can't see said eyes. " V-Vincent...! " He bit his lower lip. Vincent was so close... Why the hell was he so close?!

" ... Because... " The purple one did a twirl and picked Scott up. Running outside with him- It was dark and snowing! " LET IT GO, LET IT GO~! " the phone head screamed before landing in the cold pile of snow. In his pajamas.

" AAAAAAH!! I HATE THE SONG, I HATE THE COLD AND I HATE YOU!! " Scott grabbed a handful of snow in his hand and threw it at Vincent's laughing face.

" ... " The snow dripped down his face. Scott stared before snickering. " Oh, it is  _so_ on. " Vincent got up and grabbed more snow. The phone grinned as he got up and took a run for it. " Get back here and face me like a man! Man vs- "

" Man vs Grape?? Hah! " The killer grinned. Running after Scott.

" I'll make you eat those words! "

* * *

One gigantic snowball fight later and both males were back inside the house, drinking some hot cocoa with mini marshmallows. Scott's feet were all red from the cold and Vincent was sure he couldn't feel them anymore. Or the rest of his body, really. The phone was trembling but the grape knew he smiled under the phone.

" That was fun! " Scott mused. " But next time, atleast let me get dressed. I'm freezing now...! "

" It'll be a miracle if you don't get sick! "

" If I get sick, I'll whoop and wallop your ass. "

" In battle~? " Scott snickered and shook his head. " So. Would you say you're more of a comic nerd or a gamer nerd? Or an Otako? " The phone tapped his phone chin a bit in thought.

" I'm more of a gamer than anything else, I think. But if anyone starts saying DC is better than Marvel, I will fight! I will bite! Then I'll wash my mouth clean from the filth with some bleach. " He stuck his tongue out. But Vincent couldn't see said tongue because of. Well. The phone.

" You can bite me anytime, Scotty~ "

" Fuck off. " Ugh. Of course Vincent would think dirty. " I'd rather you flirt with my sister than- "

" Okay! " ... Wait what. Vincent pulled out his purple phone. Showing a number- sure enough, it was Luna's number. " Let's see... what pick-up line should I use first~? " Scott's jaw dropped as he dialed in the number.

" H-Hey!! " the phone head tried to pounce on the other to grab the cellphone. " Give me the phone, Vincent!! Or I swear to god, I will- "

" Lemme sleepover. "

" Huh? " The phone rose a brow as Vincent pushed him away from the purple cellphone. " Sleepover? You do realise you could have just asked?? It would have been easier than trying to blackmail me! "

" Would you have  _seriously_ let me sleepover if I didn't blackmail you? " ...

...

" Good point. Okay, okay! Fine! You can stay here! Just don't call my sister and  _flirt_ with her! " Vincent shut his phone off with a smirk. Hugging on the phone with a purr.

" I knew you'd see it my way. "

" You are a bucket of purple fuck. "

" And you're gorgeous. " ... He wears a darn heckin' phone for a head. And is 'gorgeous'?? Uff... Vincent sure is a weirdo. But... then again. It makes the phone wonder.

Why was he still smiling...? Vincent nuzzled and purred.

" I'll make you a friendship bracelet later, Mr. Ring Ring~ " and there goes that smile.

" Don't call me that, you grinning eggplant man. "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And so.  
> The phone was a tsundere.


	8. Hey, hey, hey- CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW???

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Can you hear your inner gay arguing with you, Scott?

Ah, what a wonderful morning. Birds are chirping. Snow is sparkling. Phone wearing nerds are raging.

Oh, yeah. There were loud yells coming from Scott's room. Vincent rose a brow and wandered away from the comfy couch. Sneaking over to the phone head's room. He was sitting in pajamas at the computer and had headphones on, so he didn't notice the Grape slip in. Instead, he continued yelling and screaming at the monitor.

" YOU SICK AND TWISTED DIGITAL MOTHERF- STOP ERPing IN WHORESHIRE OR I SWEAR TO CHRIS METZEN AND THE FUCKING CURSED OLD GOD SPIRIT IN AZEROTH, I WILL DESTROY YOU AND OBLITERATE YOUR WORTHLESS FAMILIES-!! " ... Ooooookay. Seems he gets a bit... mad. When gaming- Vincent ducked as Scott grabbed his red keyboard and threw it out the window. His headphones plugging out as some people were talking in all kinds of different languages.

" Woah, Scott! Calm down, holy toast! "

" CALM DOWN???? " the phone turned to him. Growling. Vincent would be lying if he said that growl didn't turn him on slightly- " THESE PEOPLE ARE MORE INSANE AND STUPID THAN ANY FOX YIFFING EMPLOYEE I'VE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE BEFORE!! " The nerd sunk back on his chair. Crossing his arms and grumbling something in... spanish? Mexican? French? The grape had absolutely no idea. " HALT DEINE SCHEIß KLAPPE DU VERFICKTER- " Okay, that was angry german. Vincent grabbed Scott's arm and pulled him up. " What the hell are you doing...?? " The purple male ignored the other's words as he held him close.

" Caaaaalm down, nerd. You're gonna end up waking some people in Alaska. " Scott stared at the other before huffing and crossing his arms. " Plus, I've got the friendship bracelet for you~! " 

" ... Oh really? " Nod nod. " ... Okay, I'll bite. Lay it on me. "

" Don't look~! " The phone head turned his face away. Looking elsewhere... That is. Before he heard a loud click. " Alright, check it out! " Scott looked at his wrist and sure enough. Something was on it. But it wasn't a friendship bracelet... it was handcuffs.

" ........... " Vincent. Handcuffed himself. To Scott. " ..................... " The phone looked up to stare at the purple idiot with a shit-eating grin. Said idiot, looked up towards Scott. " ................................. "

" ... I love you- "

" Fuck off, murderer. " Vincent blinked a few times. " Why so surprised? Vincent, almost everyone knows at Freddy Fazbears. Hell, who do you think Boss tasked with hiding the evidence?? "

" ... You???? "

" No, it was Spiderman- OF COURSE ME, IDIOT! " Scott huffed. " Why the fuck did you handcuff us together, anyways?? " Vincent tugged the phone closer. " H-Hey-! " A bright blush appeared on the nerd's cheeks. Boy, he's just glad that Vincent doesn't have x-ray vision and can't see under the phone. The purple male stared for a long time. Why...

Why the hell is it moments like this, that get Scott to fluster so much?!

" ... I never think first before preforming actions~! " The grape winked and grinned.

...

" You fuc- "

" Hey, why do ya think I do the stuff that I do, Scotty~? " The taller tapped his chin in thought.

" You mean like fucking the toaster and murdering children? " nod nod. " Maybe because you're absolutely insane??? That's a thing! " Vincent pouted. " Now gimme the key so we can get outta this mess! "

" Oh, sure. Lemme just reach into my body. " ... What. " You heard me. I swallowed the key. "

....................

" FUCKING WHY?!? " Scott almost felt like crying. How can someone so smooth and attractive also be so goddamn stupid and... and... He stared at Vincent. 

...

AND JUST BE A FUCKBOI IN GENERAL?! 

Scott groaned before sighing in defeat.

" Alright. We're visiting Mojacha today. " Mojacha... Hm. Has Vincent heard that name before, or not? " First. I need to get dressed. " Vincent whistled. " ... " Scott grabbed a blanket and draped it over fuckgrape. 

" Awh... "

" Shut up. " He mumbled. He can't change his shirt because of the damn handcuffs... But he  _can_ change his pants and put shoes on. Hopefully Mojacha can pick locks- Oh, who is the phone kidding?? She's a sinner and crazy. Of course she can pick locks.

* * *

The comic book store owner stared at the situation infront of her. Scott handcuffed to a hot purple hunk. It's a freakin' mystery to her, why the phone won't give the Eggplant a chance... But eh. It's his life. However, this was hard not to laugh at.

" Mojacha! "

" You two are absolutely precious! " The female smiled. Pushing her glasses up as she worked to make sure her ponytail was in place. " Okay, lemme see your love lock. " She hummed as she checked the lock.

" Can you unlock it...? "

" Can I?? Scott, how insulting. Your lock is better than this and I break into your place all the time to steal your Mountain Dew! " The tall male blinked a few times before gasping.

" Thief!! "

" Muahahah! " Vincent stared at Mojacha for a good while.

...

He likes her!

" So, Scott. What's so bad about her? She seems almost normal to me! " Mojacha's yellow eyes brightened up at this statement.

" Ahahah! Scotty! Look how innocent he is~! " 

" Innocent my ass... But yeah, compared to you? He's a freakin' angel. " A child killer? Innocent compared to her? What the hell? " Heh. Alright, you look confused Vincent. Lemme demonstrate. Mojacha, what would you do to this purple fuck in bed? " Ow. Rude. The female tapped her chin as she picked the lock. A click was heard and Scott was free, mumbling a thank you.

" I have lists! " ... Lists? She pulled from her pocket a hefty looking scroll. Unrolling it.

It went across the room but was still going longer. By now, half the room was covered by one paper listing off all kinds of kinks. Vincent's jaw dropped. Okay. Okay, he gets it now. Raising his hands into the air and almost begging for mercy. This lady is too sinful, even for the child murderer.

" This is the first and shortest one. Anyways! Scott, someone left this for ya! " Mojacha dropped the scroll and went over to her desk. Taking out a pink envelope. " Loooooove letter from a secret admirer~! " The phone blinked a couple of times. Secret admirer? There's someone else as insane as Vincent?

The purple male seemed to tense as Scott opened up the letter. 

'Dear Scott.

So, we've known eachother for a long time and... I think it's time I built up the courage to tell you how I truely feel... It's time. But I'm still not ready. Sorry if this is an inconvenience but I really... I really like you. Love you.'

The phone head flustered up. This was... actually really sweet... That's when he felt arms wrap around him from behind. Vincent...?

" Scott. " He spoke seriously. Looking at the phone head. " Will you go out with me? " ... Yes... Yes, Vincent flirted all the time and Scott shouldn't be surprised at this but... He sounded so serious. Not just flirty or obnoxious... But like-

_Like. Really hot._

_Excuse me?? Are you forgetting who this is?? This is the purple fuck who-_

The straight thought was soon silenced when Vincent pulled him closer. Wanting an answer and... and... Scott felt his knees go weak. They felt like jelly, so close to this killer...

...

Killer...

...

WHAT KIND OF DRUGS IS HE ON??? Vincent is a purple CHILD MURDERER. He shouldn't- can't fall for someone who kills children! Oh, god. He needs to find a way out of this a-s-a-p...!! Scott looked around before-

" I-I can't... Because... " Vincent looked so hurt while Mojacha just seemed plain curious. " Because I... " C'mon Scott... Get a hold of yourself... " I LOVE MIKE! "

.........

_........._

_........._

_Hey, it's me. Gay thoughts. And I'm here to tell you- you are SO gay._

Scott quickly pulled away and fled from the store. What the fuck did he just do?!

DID HE SERIOUSLY AVOID TELLING VINCENT YES TO THE DATE BY SAYING HE LIKED THAT PUN-TELLING ASSHOLE???

He doesn't even know who's worse of the two...

_Vincent fucked your toaster._

Yeah, okay. Mike is probably better than the grape.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor nerd is in denial.


	9. IT'S YA BOI-

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's time...  
> My friends...
> 
> Jay: FOR YA BOOOOOOI!
> 
> Goddamn it.

It was time for work and the mood has been rather tense... Vincent and Scott hadn't talked the whole way to the restaraunt. Staying absolutely silent. Once in the restaraunt, the purple male moved away before the phone head could even build the courage to say something... anything!

Scott sighed. Going to his office and sitting down. Hands holding his phone face.

" ... " He thought about his actions... There were so many different things he could have said that would probably have worked out better!! Instead he decided to break Vincent's heart by pulling Mike into this... " ... I AM SUCH AN IDIOT! "

" Are you now, Marvel Fanboy? " Oh. Oh, just great. No- fucking marvelous. It was the Phone DUDE. Scott looked up to eye the very short male. His sky blue eyes practically glinting with mischief. " Hey, hun. I know my eyes are captivating. But like- I'm not gay. "

" Shut the hell up, asshole. "

" I'm a born asshole. You know it! " Jay June. A complete smug asshole who somehow knows of stuff despite nobody saying a word. Nobody really knows how, but Mike suggested he might have connections. Yeah, right. Fourth Wall breaking connections? Ridiculous. " So. You having a lover's quarrel with the purple child murderer? " And here we see a perfect example of him just knowing stuff.

" I didn't know you were a stalker too... " The tall male glared at the raven haired shorty. " Midget. "

" Ouuuuch. No need to get personal, Scotterino. I just noticed you two walked in all quiet and all. Normally if you two were to walk in, Vincent would be clinging to you like how my daughter clings to cocoa. "

" I'm surprised you managed to even find a significant other. Much less conceive a child. " Scott let out an empty chuckle.

" Okay. Soooo- Is Pike a thing now? " Pike? What- " Y'know. Mike/Phone Guy? Has the ship sailed? " the phone operator practically choked. " Or is it... Hm. How would Jeremy/Phone Guy even be called? "

" Oh my god. You're the worst. Like- Mike's puns are more bearable than you. "

" Oh, puns? Well, they're rather... punny. " Scott squinted. " Cheer up, PG. It's all in good pun! "

" ... I hate you. "

" Love you too! Eh... Platonically. " Jay was sure that even if Scott said he hated the shorty, he still liked the Phone Dude! Platonically, but still! Counts!

_I'd do it with a knife._

_Slowly._

_God, how I HATE HIM!!_

" ... Look, if you aren't gonna help me... Just leave me alone. I feel like driving off the Grand Canyon again. " Scott sighed. Averting his gaze a bit.

" Hey, I wouldn't be introduced into the story if I wasn't gonna help in my own fucked up way! Geez, you're as emotional as my brother when Chara came out. "

" ... " Chara is a video game character. " What drugs are you on? "

" Meth? Hell if I know. Anyways! " Jay grabbed the phone operator's hand. Grinning like an idiot as he lead him out. " I have a plan to get you and Vincent talking again. "

" Good luck, he won't even look at me ever since I mentioned 'being in love with Mike'. It won't work- " 

" Come again? " Scott squeaked at the familiar voice. Turning around to see the well known Pokemon loving asshole. Mike. He rose a brow, staring at Scott.

" ... Oooooohhhh. " Jay stared before backing away. " Okay, no. Nope. Not dealing with this! Hahah, you're on your own dude. " He tried walking off but Scott quickly picked him up. " The fuck-??? "

" Ohhhhhh, no. Nope. You aren't leaving yet you Mighty Morphin' Midget Gnome! " The Assistant Manager pushed Jay towards Mike. " You are going to explain to Schmidt what happened! I am not going over this again! "

" Yeah, that would be rather bored to readers. " Scott facepalmed. Why do they hire the weirdos? Then again, only weirdos and insane people would take this job anyways... " But what about you and the overgrown Grape? What'll you- "

" You know what? Since you mentioned Chara... How about I push that magical ACT button and just go over to talk to him! Or atleast try! " He blinked before chuckling. " Now, you shut up about that and just explain to Mike. That's an order, or you're fired. " Scott continued on. Leaving the two assholes alone as he went to the saferoom. Taking a deep breathe, he pushed the door open.

Vincent was staring at the Yellow Spring Bonnie Suit. The phone head took a deep breathe. Staring at the purple male and taking a few steps forward.

" Vincent? " he called out. The grape tilted his head and looked at the phone.

" ... Shouldn't you be with Schmidt right now... " His white eyes were mere slits right now. His voice dripping with... anger? Betrayal...? While Scott would normally not be phazed by someone who stared angrily at him, due to the phone covering his face and therefore- also his nervousness...

But now?

Now he felt different.

Guilt. His heart ached as the usual wide grin that was plastered on the purple man's face was gone.

" N-No... No I shouldn't..." Scott, who was normally great with his word choices for each person he talked to, realised his mistake only after Vincent got up and snapped at him.

" Shouldn't... Shouldn't! Hahah!! He says he  _shouldn't_ be with Schmidt! Oh, isn't that just... priceless...~ " He sauntered over to a shelf and took a Spring Bonnie Paper Mask. They hadn't sold those things ever since people started finding them creepy... " He... Hah, he should've died because of Foxy... Why the fuck is he still here??? Should I finish it...?  _Ohhhhh, those screams...~!_ " The assistant manager took a step back, only to be pinned against the wall by his wrists. "  _They're talking, Scott!! Hahah, why don't you talk too~? You like talking all the time~!! Talk to me, Mr. Ring Ring...~_ " The male twitched.

Scott's eyes were wide with fear near him. His heart pounding right out of his chest.

" V-Vincent, I didn't mean- "

" Didn't mean what? Are you playing with him too? " He growled. " Scotty, you can't imagine how much I  **HATE HIM** right now... But I  _don't_ like people who play little  **MIND GAMES** like that... So, what the  **FUCK** do you have to say for yourself?! " He grabbed Scott by the hem of his shirt. Raising him up. " Go on...  **A N S W E R  M E .** "

The phone head was officially scared. He was shaking... but... Here he still was. It wasn't like he was trying to kick the other off or anything... He was silent... just shaking... Scott couldn't find his voice... But that's when he noticed something drop down the purple man's face.

" ... A-Are... you... crying...? " The grape froze.

Dropping Scott to the ground as he took a step back. 

" Why... Why are you so... so- " The phone scrambled to his feet and grabbed the other. Hugging the murderer close. " ... "

" I'd... like to go on a date with you. " Vincent's eyes widened. Trying to look at the other. " I'm just such an idiot... Always s-scared and... such... " he shook his head. " And... heh... I'll be honest, can't you tell that you're rather... uhm. "

" Much? " The shorter offered as an answer.

" A bit much. Yeah. "

The two were silent for a good while before Vincent pulled away. Petting the phone sweetly.

" ... Pick you up an hour after our shift ends? So you could uhm... Get ready? "

" ... S-Sounds good... " Scott had a quirky smile spreading on his face under the phone head. The shorter and more lanky male patted the other's clothes down. Trying not to pull a flirt that would make the taller nervous or disgusted. " So... "

" ... See you later, alligator!! " Vincent attempted. Winking and finger banging.

" ... " The only answer was a squint.

" ... " The grape moonwalked right out of the saferoom.

" Dork. " Scott chuckled, shaking his head.


	10. Dating is hard.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dating is hard when you've got friends who ship you.

" Hoooooly fuck!! You've got a date??? " Scott groaned from the high voice coming from his cellphone. Sighing and chuckling softly as his best friend Mojacha squealed. " Sorry, but I'm just really excited. "

" Why? I mean. It's just... a-a silly date. "

" Dude! Ever since Richard, you've been Depression in a Nutshell! "

" Oh, thanks. I care about you too. " Scott shook his head with an eyeroll. " And you've been single for a while too! "

" There's a difference between us, Scotter. I'm single and ready to mingle! You're a phone head. " The male phone-palmed. " 'Nuff said. Anyways! Soooo. Is it the hunky grape~? I wouldn't mind tapping that~! "

" You would tap anything! Remember when we played the Ink Machine game?? You wanted fuck the cultist guy! "

" Hey! He had a nice body! And that ink? Rawr~ "

" You're insane. Vincent doesn't even hold a candle light against you in insanity OR sinfulness. And he's murdered people! You're still more terrifying! "

" Why, thank you. Anyways! Whatcha gonna wear for the date? C'mon, you can't wear anything plain! Imagine he wears a suit! Ohoho~! " He bit his lower lip, thinking about it. Gah, it's true... what if he wears a suit with that stupid... sexy smirk... Well built but still lanky... " Earth to Healer! Healer Scott! C'mon! " Oh yeah. " Hey! Remember that suit your sis got you when she wanted you to wear it to prom, but then you ended up wearing a dress due to bullying and stuff! "

" The girls were jealous I could rock a dress better than any of them! Not to mention how those high heels went so well! "

" Yeah, twinkle toes. But that's not what I'm getting at. After all, you aren't supposed to wear a dress to your date! That would be crazy! " She snickered. " Wear the suit! It would look good with that deep forest green color! Compliments your phone and if you left that thing at home, it would compliment your hair! "

" I'm not taking my phone off. "

" Just sayin'. Anyways. I need to go. I lost a bet to Ollie. Considering you've got a date. " She hung up.

...

Did she. Just pretty much say she made a bet that Scott would stay single forever? Yes. Yes she did.

Ugh.

Why is he friends with her again? Oh, yeah. Owner of a Comic Bookstore = Free comic books. Plus, she's a great gamer. He sighed as he got up to his room. Time to wear a suit, then.

* * *

The doorbell rang. Scott fixed his tie up before walking over and opening the door. Vincent stood there, his hair tied in a usual ponytail. A bowtie... suit...

Oh damn, that smirk fits so well too... Not to mention he's lanky and-

Oh no, he's hot...

" Scotty? " The taller snapped out of his daydreaming and glanced at Vincent. He chuckled softly at the phone's flustered expression. " Eyes are up here, luv. "

" Wh-Whatever! Geez... Let's just... go. " Vincent held his arm out. Scott squinted as he walked right past the purple male. Nope nope nope! He's not gonna fall for that romance! He can't! 

" Scott. Car is to your left. " He sighed and turned his head.

Only to let his jaw drop. It was an expensive looking purple car! I mean- How the hell did Vincent afford this with his paycheck??? 

Scott stared at the vehicle.

Then Vincent.

Then back to the vehicle.

" Whaaaaat? I've got my ways. " The grape smirked and lead Scott into the car. Opening the passenger seat. " Surely, you've seen a car before. Don't you drive? "

" Vincent, the last time I drived... I think I got a higher kill streak than you in the last 7 years. " The purple man shook his head with a chuckle. Letting the phone get into the car. " Where are we going? "

" There's this fancy chinese restaraunt. I think you'll like it. "

* * *

When Vincent said the restaraunt was gonna be fancy... Scott didn't know it would be  _this_ fancy! It was a four story building! Each floor had two buffets and BY THE GODS. DID IT LOOK EXPENSIVE. Again, he stared at the purple male in disbelief.

" Only the best for my little phone head. "

" I am nowhere near  _yours_ ya dingus. " The taller playfully punched Vincent's shoulder whilst rolling his eyes. The grape took Scott's hand and lead him to a table with a little candlelight. Gah, why did cheesy and romantic stuff be the phone's weakness?? 

They both sat in silence for a good long while. The phone glancing up at Vincent a couple of times... That ever present grin.

" So, Scott. " Vincent placed his hands on the table. Fingers tapping against the surface. Tap, tap, tap. Tap, tap, tap. Tap, tap, tap- " What would you like to eat? I can get it for you. "

" I'm perfectly fine with getting it myself, Bishop. " He smirked playfully under the red phone. Getting up before the grape could protest and getting his food.

He watched Vincent go to the other buffet with the sushi and such. Letting out a sigh.

Why did Scott feel so nervous? Maybe it was the ambience. He had this feeling like he was being watched. But not by Vincent, it was... different. He turned to inspect all the tables around him. Some families, some couples, Mike and Jeremy, a group of teenagers-

wait.

He stared at Mike and Jeremy who noticed his gaze. Both raising newspapers up with holes in them for the eyes.

" ... Oh my god, I hate them- " The phone huffed and walked right over. Glaring. " What the hell are you two doing here? "

" Sir, my wife and I are busy. Please do your own thing. " Mike changed his voice up a bit. There was silence before he nudged Jeremy who pulled up a higher pitched voice.

" O-Oh, yes...! Please leave us be as we look at the menu and wait for our son. " Scott grabbed the newspapers and ripped it from their grips.

" These are newspapers you idiots! And- wait. Son? " Jeremy pointed at the buffet Vincent was at. His date was staring at Fritz in slight disbelief as the shortest male was emptying out the buffet. " ... I hate you all. You have no idea. "

" C'mon, Scott. Chill. You're just whipping out a buffet of trouble. " Scott rolled the newspaper up and whacked Mike over the head with it. " Ow! Hey! " The phone stomped over to Vincent.

Grabbing him and dragging him to a different floor. Specifically, the rooftop. A few tables were there and the nightsky could be seen.

" This is better anyways. If they follow us up here, I'm shoving them off the rooftop. " The purple male stared before chuckling and holding Scott close.

" I love you so much~! C'mon, let's chow down! " He dragged the taller along to the buffet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What's this??  
> I'm here with a new chapter???  
> By golly-


	11. Standing up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Scott ain't gonna let himself keep getting bullied.

" OH MY GOSH, SCOTT YOU DID IT!! " Mojacha squealed as she hugged the phone-head over the counter. Ollie just read comic books silently. Glancing up at them once in a while. " So! When's the next date? Wedding? KIDS?? Hahahah! "

" You crazy lady! We're not that far yet! " Scott nudged her as she clapped her hands. " I don't want us to move that fast! Just... wanna take my time. Enjoy the feeling! Eheh... not like it'll last long... "

" Oh, be optimistic Scott! This is your big break! You can be happy and stop stressin'! " She rolled her eyes with a smile. Placing a few books, reserved for costumers to pick up, away. " Is it because of Jonathan? "

" Oh, gosh golly. Is it? Ugh... " He sighed and shook his head. " That obvious, huh? " The female shrugged, pushing her glasses up. " Look, I wanna relax and enjoy- but with my job, that isn't easy and you know it. It just got a hell of a lot worse since he came along... He already  _is_ bossing me around! "

" You're the assistant manager. Can't ya fire him? Or does he... uh- " Mojacha didn't need an answer as she just noticed her fellow nerd's dead phone stare. It's really weird how a phone can be so expressive. " Look, I've asked this before but I feel like I need to ask again. Why don't you get yourself a different freaking job? Like here! A few extra brain cells wouldn't hurt! " Ollie gave his friend a slight glare as she chuckled. " No offence. You're more muscle than brain. Opposite for Scotty and I'm all in one! "

" Pervert does not equal brains OR strength. "

" Rude. " She stuck her tongue out. " Look, all I'm saying is that maybe you should quit while you're still alive. I haven't gone there since the creepy bite shit happened. I mean- I wouldn't mind yiffing the fox- "

" DON'T. YIFF. THE. FOX. "

" -but like! That thing almost killed the kid! Kinky stuff is great and all but no kinky stuff with kids! No sir! "

" How is a kid almost dying 'kinky'-? On second thought. I  _really_ don't wanna know. " He shook his head. " And... I dunno- I'm too deep into this! I can't just quit! "

" That is pure Hogger-Fogger and you know that. "

" Hogger... wha- Nevermind. Say what you will but I'm not just gonna quit. " Scott crossed his arms.

" What about Jonathan now? " he rose a brow. " What do you plan to do about him? Get a mini heart-attack whenever you see the guy? Maybe another panic attack and call your sis up? You should fight back. Tell him the deal's off. He's probably bluffing about the vid anyways! "

" I don't know! I... I'll figure it out, okay?? " Both stared at eachother in complete silence. That's when the previously silent third party finally spoke up.

" Uh, guys? " Both looked to Ollie who shut the comic book in his hands. " We're still on for Competitive plays, right? " Mojacha nodded with a smile.

" Yeah, totally. " Scott smiled under the phone. " Once I do my daily call, I'll be on. Be our shield, Reinhardt. " Ollie puffed his chest up and called out as the taller left the shop.

" HAHAH! ZIS'LL BE A GLORIOUS BATTLE!! " Mojacha stared at the younger male.

" That was the worst fake german accent ever, I'm disowning you. "

* * *

Vincent poked Mike's cheek. 

And again.

And again.

And agai-

" If you don't stop that right now, I'm shoving the toaster up your ass. "

" But Miiiiiiike. I'm booooored. " The purple male puffed his cheeks as the shorter rolled his eyes. " Plus, I need to talk to you. It's about someone here. " He glanced at their new blonde colleague who was currently cleaning the toilets up.

" You mean that Jonathan dude? Yeah, what about him? "

" I don't like him. "

" And nobody likes you. Your point? " The grape huffed, glaring at the other. " Well, anyways. Yeah, I know what you mean. He seems... off. Overly nice and shit. " They watched the male work a bit more before the doors opened. Scott was a bit late, not that any of them really minded.

Less work for them!

" Jonathan. " His voice was stern as he walked towards the blonde. Mike and Vincent blinkednin surprise. When Scott was mad, he'd normally just yell and his voice would go all squeaky. When he was all natural, he just sounded irritated.

But this was different.

He was serious.

Seriously mad.

" Mhm, Cawthon~? " a flirtatious grin grew on Jonathan's face. " What's wrong, Pretty Boy~? " Vincent didn't like this tone at all. And neither did Scott as he huffed.

" You. Me. Office, now. " The blonde rolled his eyes as he followed the assistant manager. Once in the office, they shut the door.

* * *

Scott let out a tired sigh. Taking his seat behind his desk. Then staring at that... cheeky grin... on the other's face. It disgusted the phone head. Made him feel sick in the stomach.

" Well, Pretty Boy~? What- "

" The deal's off. " Silence filled the room. Uncomfortable... deadly... silence.

" ...  _What_. " Scott cleared his throat. Hands cupped on his desk. No... He's not gonna back down... Mojacha is right! He has to stand up to... to this... jerk. He can't let himself feel shattered because of what he did all those years ago. He  _won't._

" You heard me. I won't let myself get bullied by you. I'm not fucking 6 anymore. I am the assistant manager and can  _fire_ you if need be. " He glared.

" Scott, I've still got the video of you and you know it. "

" You've got proof of me being raped by you as a goddamn six year old. Yet you're fucking flaunting it like Jack Sparrow did, a jar of dirt. You post that anywhere and you're done. End of the line. Curtains dropped- you'll probably end up in prison. " The blonde stared before grabbing Scott by the hem of his shirt. " Or... You could quit this job and we never talk again. I'm sure I can think of a reason that just gets you fired instead of, well. Dead. It's your choice. " The hands holding the phone-head's shirt were shaking.

Scott was sure that if the fabric hadn't been there, Jonathan would be digging his nails into his very skin.

" You called me worthless... But look who's on top now! " That's when the blonde finally spoke. 

" Give me one good reason why I shouldn't beat you with your own fucking phone. " As a reply, Scott simply pointed at a corner of the room. The camera. " ... " The male growled and let go. " Fuck this job... " He stomped out. Leaving the door open. Finally, Scott let out a breathe of relief. It's over, he did it. He stood up to his childhood bully and... and rapist.

" ... I-I... did it... " He smiled wildly. " I did it! Hahah! T-Take that!! " A familiar voice spoke up.

" Wow. You seem really happy. " Vincent. He walked inside with a smirk. " You're even crying through your phone. How does that even work? " The question was ignored as the taller just pulled the purple male into a hug.

" Hahah! Who cares?? " The grape grinned and just held Scott close. Nuzzling him sweetly. " He's gone and he's not coming back! "

Right?

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you, to my Senpai who thought of the name of the fanfic.  
> I probably would have named it something stupid like-  
> The Phone and the Aubergine or something.  
> I'm not that creative with names.


End file.
